To be, or not to be…Let me explain.I’m a ghost!Hamlet and Laertes, dueling.Polonias: I’ll save you!The QueenI’ll go crazy!Nothing! Absolutely nothing!Whoooooo!!!!!Irrelevant!!!!Ok, enough silence.Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?Like, who cares what your name is???A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.Like, when we named our dog Arfy, and my mom wanted to name it Gandalf…Doff thy name…Look, if you want, we can go by our middle names!So we really know about the Bard?Is he really a British Literary Historian???Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!How many times has this happened to you?…kick…You need Shakespeare in a Can!Shakespeare in a Can???Glug, glug, glugYeah, now what?Thou art a fool born canker blossom!No! Stop!He hath no more brains than I have in mine elbow!Why would you say, “Moo!”“Because I’m a cow!”When will we three witches meed again?Banquo and Macbeth!All hail King Macbeth!I have come with news from the King.He has made…someone…Thane of Cawdor.Take a letter, “Dear wife…”“…Love, your Husband, Macbeth”Imagine, Queen Me!An ominous meetingMacbeth in the darkLet’s murder him most foul!Is this a knife which I see before me?All the oceans of the world would not wash the blood from my hand…Banquo’s pointing at me! Accusing me!Get a hold of yourself!Double, double toil and trouble…Let us conjure fearsome spiritsWhat, will the hands ne’er be clean?Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow…Here they come!MacDuff!Macbeth!!! Ah! Splinter!To the death!Huzzah!!!Ms. Purdie, where’s my one o’clock?Let’s talk about Titus AndronicusThe ever-present skullAnd they cut his head off!It’s The Dating Game!JulietThe fieldDude, I would get you a bitchin’ skull on fire, with a sword through it, and snake coming out of its mouth!Oh, I believe in love, I just don’t think it has anything to do with marriage!Uh, I’m Bob.Him! I want him!Thus, with a kiss, I die…If we shadows have offended…Let’s go get some pie!
